Trust, what does it mean anyway?

I looked up the definition for trust and this is what it says, "the trait of trusting; of believing in the honesty and reliability of others ."
I have been working for a week, and am really enjoying it! But, so far I'm not getting full-time hours, which is what I was hired for. I have worked a total of 8 hours up until today. I'm sorry, but only making minimum wage for 8 hours in a week isn't going to pay for school next year. I really don't want to quit, because people keep telling me, wait a bit longer and you will get more hours, and besides I love my job!
So, I try and rely on God to provide. I don't know or understand how He can provide that much money in the little time left, but I know He has done it before and can do it again if I just trust and rely on Him.
How's everyone else doing?

East Side Marios East Side Marios eh budda boom budda bing!

I'm did indeed get a job, guess where?! Yep, East Side Marios! Full time hostess! Hired on the spot and start tomorrow!! Crazy eh?
I had an awesome time in Barrie and Collingwood this past weekend! I got to see family that I haven't seen in over a year which is always nice! Our family is so close, even when we haven't seen each other in so long! Thank goodness for msn!! I think all of the grandkids on my mom's side has msn now which is awesome!

I better get going, I have to get up early to find clothes to wear to work tomorrow!

Night!

Today's Forcast: High Winds and Blowing Snow!

This describes my life right now, in every way possible. I heard this forcast, and it hit me, high winds are like the relationships with people...they can be very tense at times. Blowing snow, well that is my life right now. It feels like I'm standing in a whirlwhind of blowing snow, everything is going on around me and here I stand, slightly tossed around, but trying to stay on my feet, but the wind keeps pushing me. I try and keep a smile on my face as if everything is fine but I keep getting pushed and shoved by the wind.
This may not make sense, it was just a thought. Life is rough right now, I'm really wishing I could just rent an apartment and move out, but I know that isn't reality right now. Please be praying for me!

I wonder...

I sit here and wonder. Why me? I am so confused about life and where God is taking me. I also wonder if I will make it through another day. I don't get it. I don't understand why parents cannot be supportive, and why when one is doing something totally insane the other one won't step up to the plate and back the child up when he/she knows that what they are doing is wrong. I don't like living at home again, it is hard and I want to move out and be on my own. I wonder, would it be easier to live on my own? Would I get more OSAP for school? Would I get more respect from my parents? Would they finally treat me like an adult?

I got a job!

Hey Everyone, well, my interview thing went well this morning and I have a job. I start training Monday, and work from 7am-2pm Monday - Friday for 2 weeks straight. Then it is training on the phone for two weeks. I think it should be good, it's with Sears, Call Center, it is the Home Central part of it.
I leave tomorrow for NB, and I'm hoping to see most of you, if I don't see you stop by my room in JP on Thursday. I am also hoping to get to a chapel service, but we will see how that works out!
I guess God is in control. I need to keep trusting that, as hard as it can be some days.

Keep your chin up my friend!

Have Patience

This is something I really need to learn! I have a hard time being patient. I just had an argument with my dad, and I hate when they happen. I just wish I could be more patient with both of my parents. It's hard living at home after being on your own for a year and a half, and not having to tell someone where your going and when you'll be back, even though my parents don't mind me going places and don't care when I come home.

Sorry, had to vent. Things other than above are going well. I'm still looking for a job but put my resume in at Job Connect, where they help people find jobs and I have an appointment monday with an emplyoment counselor. Today is my mom's birthday, and worship practice tonight. Tomorrow we will probably celebrate my mom's birthday with my brother and his family and my grandma and maybe even my sister and her fiance.

I love this weather! I was in town all day yesterday, and driving around with the windows down, and then I had to go to the nearest beckers and get eggs, (which is 15 minutes away) and it was like 9:30 at night and I had the windows down! It was GREAT! Today it's snowing, but it isn't too cold I don't think. We will see!

I hope you are all doing well, and I can't wait to see you soon!

Later

Not sure where I'm going...

I have been trying my best to keep a positive attitude about this whole situation but it is really hard! I have not found a job and just don't understand why this is all happening. I've been continaully having my quiet time and it's been really cool what God is teaching me through that, every night's devotion feels like it has been written just for me for that certain night! I had a difficult day yesterday because everyone was headed back to school, everyone but me that is. I really don't get it...

Wanted - A Job!

Life sure can change within a matter of seconds! I came home last Friday night to receive a letter in the mail, and the results of this letter--I am taking a semester off from Bethany. This may come as a huge surprise to some of you as I love my life at BBC. I am going to work this semester, and apply again in the fall. This semester I plan to do some visiting around the area with some people that used to go to Bethany, I am also singing on the worship team at church and involved in a College and Careers Group. I am excited because I am going to be able to go to my cousin's reception that just got married on December 27. It will be great to have the family together again!! I am looking on the bright side of things and ready to see what God is going to do in my life. Just this week He has already been just helping me to look at the bright side of the situation, and to totally trust in Him.
I am right now in the midst of looking for a job. I will be heading up to Bethany soon to pick up all of my stuff. I'm not sure when it will be, but if you want to get together, or at least meet up so we can say hi, let me know!!
Ciao

Enjoying the break!

Hey! It has been a great time at home! I had a busy but awesome Christmas; Christmas Eve my family went to church, I went and picked up my neices and we drove into church and then back out to my house to have snacks and family time, which is always a lot of fun! Christmas Day my dad had to wake me up...and my sister and her fiance came and we did stockings and gifts with them, and breakfast. I went and had a nap (something that usually doesn't happen for me on Christmas day)!! We went later on to my brother and sister-in-law's house for gifts with them and Christmas dinner. It was delicious! Boxing Day (for you american readers--the day after Christmas ;) ) My sister-in-law, mom and aunt went for a girls breakfast, and then went shopping! It was a lot of fun!!
I hope you are all having a great break and great time with family! How was your Christmas?

I am home!

24 hours later, and one snowstorm later I made it home! I was one of the lucky ones, having my flight cancelled out of St.John last night! I called a friend and got a ride to my aunt's house, and my ticket got changed to tonight at the same time I was supposed to fly out yesterday! I am home....finally! I am so happy to be here too!
Exams went well, they are over! Praise the Lord! I am home for 3 weeks and don't have to do anything! I am singing tomorrow for the church worship service...which should be fun!
I hope you are all doing well! Leave one!
Merry Christmas!

Christmas Banquets!

So, I am wondering why school cannot just finish after classes are done. Why do we need finals? They just stress out the students and profs as well, as they have to put the exam together, and sit there for 2 hours until we finish them. So, my question is what is the point?
Anyway, last night was the Christmas banquet, it was a lot of fun!! I went with a big group of girls, and we had a really great time!
Today was the Awana Christmas banquet, and we had to go set up in the afternoon, then go back down later for the actual banquet. It was good, but could have been better if I was feeling better.I am ready to go home! I leave in 6 sleeps, and I'm flyin! A week from yesterday I will be home! I cannot wait!
Just a little poem to leave you with:

T’was the night before finals,
And all through the college,
The students were praying,
For last minute knowledge.
Most were quite sleepy,
But none touched their beds,
While visions of essays
Danced in their heads.Out in the taverns,
A few were still drinking,
And hoping that liquor
Would free up their thinking.In my own room,
I had been pacing,
And dreading exams I soon would be facing.My roommate was speechless,
Her nose in her books,
And my comments to her
Drew unfriendly looks.I drained all the coffee,
And brewed a new pot,
No longer caring that
My nerves were shot.I stared at my notes,
But my thoughts were muddy,
My eyes went a blur,
I just couldn't study."Some pizza might help,"
I said with a shiver,
But each place I called
Refused to deliver.I'd nearly concluded,
That life was too cruel,
With futures depending
On grades had in school.When all of a sudden,
Our door opened wide,
And Patron Saint Put-It-Off,
Ambled inside.His spirit was careless,
His manner was mellow,
All of a sudden,
He started to bellow."On Cliff Notes, on Crib Notes,
On Last Years Exams.
On Wingit and Slingit,
And Last Minute Crams."His message delivered,
He vanished from sight.
But we heard him laughing,
Outside in the night.Your teachers have pegged you,
So just do your best.
Happy Finals to All,
And to all a Good Test.

I'm Marcie

You are Marcie!

Which Peanuts Character are You?
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The sooner I can go home the better!

Not too much longer now and I can go home. I am ready to get away from Sussex, and get away from everyone and everything for 3 weeks! I am very excited about this as my dad was having health problems again and I just want to go home and give him a big hug! I'm finding that I'm missing my family a lot more this semester, I guess because of everything that has happened. I cannot wait to see my neices and nephew, and siblings and parents! I think this will be a relaxing time at home!! 1 paper, which I want to finish tonight, and 3 finals, which I'm not too worried about and I'm leaving on a jet plane! Ciao

God you are so awesome!

Chapel was incredible on Tuesday! It usually is really good, but Tuesday was different, I was really tired, and did not want to be there, I was there because I had to be. The worship time was upbeat and powerful! As Pastor John got up, I was settling down for a nap...(oops...did I say nap?) anyway, little did I know that I would be awake and alert for the whole service and God really spoke to me. The message was on the different names of God, and it was just so cool to see how many names God has and how powerful and big God is. I really think we take God for granted somtimes.
Then tonight, a friend of mine was leading D-Groups and was totally used by God, just said some things I really needed to hear at this point in the semester and time in my life. Thanks Missy!!
The semester is almost done...Keep your chin up everyone, we are almost at the end!!

Happy American Thanksgiving!

Hey! I know, its been 2 weeks since I've said anything here! Things are going well, tonight a bunch of us had an American Thanksgiving dinner! It was a lot of fun, but, being the only Canadian, I got teased the most. I am really excited about going home in 3 weeks! Yes, only 3 weeks until I get to get out of Sussex, for 3 whole weeks! It is a very exciting time!
I'm getting down to the last couple papers and presentations and then finals. I'm not too worried about any of them.
I also found out I'm moving to another dorm for next semester, which is really exciting! I get to move in with my friends and into my old apartment!
God is still working in me, and I'm still not sure how or what He's doin'. I'm just taking life a day at a time, and trusting in Him.

Later

Procrastination...

Well, a few things have happened since I last posted. Booster was last weekend, and it was great! I didn't go to all of the activities, but went to the services and the worship was awesome! I really felt like the speaker connected well with the teens. Last Sunday night at Encounter Natasha spoke and did an incredible job!! I don't think I've heard someone speak on Song of Songs quite like she did, she has such a passion for the Lord it is so awesome. This weekend was our retreat for class. I felt it went really well, although there was an accident everything went smoothly and honestly, couldn't have gone better. Everyone who attended as "campers" seemed to have a good time! We actually did get to relax, and I felt like no one was stressed about work or anything, it was a great time to hang out and get to know people, but also meet with God in solitude! Lynn and Natasha spoke and did a great job, God really put them in our path for a reason!
Five weeks from right now, I will either be home, or on my way home for 3 weeks...Christmas break. I can't believe how fast this semester has gone. I feel like the semesters fly by here at Bethany because there is so much going on, and so much to do!
God is working a lot in my life! My brother and sister-in-law are expecting another baby...which is so exciting in my opinion! I honestly, don't know how to describe what God is doing in my life, because I don't exactly know...I do know that Him and I are working on things...and it will take time. We live in such a world that is, "everything happens right now" that it is hard to be patient and just wait. I know that I need to and that everything will work out in God's timing but only in His timing. I'm really struggling with this as well though, a lot of confusion, which satan is taking advantage of. People say, "Just trust in God" and I know we all need to do that, but it can be so hard! It's like giving your best friend, (who you've never seen) your entire life and let them tell you where you are going and giving them control of your life.
Leave one...

A very much needed break...why did it have to end?

This week has been so crazy! It was mid-term week, and it seemed like everyone was really stressed! I hardly got any sleep during the week, and finally got a break! I went to my aunt and uncle's house last night, and we took my grandma to Moncton to fly back home today. It was great to spend time away from school, even if it was just for a night. My aunt and I are close in our relationship, we were talking about losing my nephew, and my sister and that whole situation. She pointed out a song to me by Casting Crowns, called, "Love Them Like Jesus" and the second verse says this:

"The gifts lie in wait, in a room painted blue

Little blessing from Heaven would be there soon

Hope fades in the night, blue skies turn to gray

As the little one slips away."

and another song, called Held by Natalie Grant

"Two months is too little.

They let him go.

They had no sudden healing.

To think that providence would

Take a child from his mother while she prays

Is appalling.

Who told us we’d be rescued?

What has changed and why should we be saved from nightmares?

We’re asking why this happens

To us who have died to live? It’s unfair.

Chorus:

This is what it means to be held.

How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life

And you survive.

This is what it is to be loved.

And to know that the promise was

When everything fell we’d be held.

This hand is bitterness.

We want to taste it, let the hatred NUMB our sorrow.

The wise hands opens slowly to lilies of the valley and tomorrow.

Bridge:

If hope is born of suffering.

If this is only the beginning.

Can we not wait for one hour watching for our Savior? "

God, you are so amazing!

Parent/Grandparent Day

Things are going pretty well! I haven't updated in a while, it's really busy here at school though! Tomorrow is Parent/Grandparent day, my grandma is in NB visiting family, so she is coming to spend the day with me! I can't wait to see her, I haven't seen her since August, I did see her for about 1/2 hour when I came home for Thanksgiving. Midterms are next week, I have one Monday, and one Tuesday, then on the weekend I'm headed for a night at my Aunt and Uncles! It will be great to have a break and hang out with family.
Keep Your Chin Up!

Why?

I don't understand it. My little nephew didn't make it, a few heartbeats old and he was just too small. He was so perfect and so tiny. It is amazing how much love can be poured into such a small little boy weighing only 1 1/2 lbs. How come other people get to keep their babies and my sister didn't. People want to give up babies, yet my sister's son didn't live. I just don't understand it. Why?

Why do people act like highschool students in college?

The last few days have been non-stop, people are acting like high school students in their relationships and I for one do not like it at all! I mean, your adults now and in college, act like it would ya!
I am really excited to go home on Wednesday even though I have to leave at an insanly crazy hour of the morning! I'm home for a week and cannot wait! I do indeed have to get through today and tomorrow though!
Ciao